Radiological Defense

Much of what we define today as "weird" looks to be weird simply because the context that surrounded its creation is no longer in place. As famously said, "The past is another country," and we all know that stuff that happens in other countries is quite often weird.

Once upon a time--in 1961--the staged documentary featured here seemed like the most sober-sided, commonsense bit of educational material. But now--

--well, see for yourselves!

Posted By: Paul - Mon Sep 08, 2008 - Comments (12)
Category: Death, Futurism, Military, Movies, Technology, War, Weapons, 1960s

Strange Candidates #1: Live-Forever Jones

With the Presidential election now less than two months away, I thought it would be appropriate to devote some posts to the stranger candidates who have run for President over the years. First up we have "Live Forever" Jones.

Leonard "Live-Forever" Jones
Born: July 3, 1797. A resident of Louisville, Kentucky.

Jones was something of a perennial candidate, declaring himself a candidate for President in every election between the late 1840s and 1860s. But his ambitions were not limited to the Presidency. He declared himself to be a candidate for every high office, both State and Federal. When, in 1867, he failed to be elected Governor of Kentucky (he received no votes), he declared himself to be the rightful Governor. He considered himself vindicated when the elected governor, John Larue Helm, died five days into his second term. Similarly, he considered Lincoln's assassination to be divine punishment for the nation's failure to elect himself.

Affiliation: Live-Forever Jones was a member of the "High Moral" party. In fact, he was its only member. The central doctrine he promoted was the belief that immortality could be achieved through a regimen of prayer and fasting. Naturally, he considered himself to be immortal. Thus, his name. He had an unusual manner of speechifying on behalf of his views. He would jump up and down while banging a hickory cane on a table to emphasize his points. Often he would bang so loudly that he would drown out his own voice.

Sadly but predictably, Jones failed to live up to his name. He caught pneumonia, refusing any medical aid because he insisted his sickness was moral, not physical. He died on August 30, 1868.

Despite his odd behavior, he was one of Louisville's favorite eccentrics. Politicians humored him by actually filing the ballots he presented to them, and when he spoke he drew huge crowds who applauded wildly at all his schemes and assertions.

Source: Keven McQueen, Offbeat Kentuckians.

Posted By: Alex - Mon Sep 08, 2008 - Comments (3)
Category: Politics, Strange Candidates

Chuck’s Hand-Picked Overnight Weird News for Monday

Lawyer banned from park after discomforting requests
Charles Douglas, 58, of Glen Carbon, Ill., called being charged with disorderly conduct "the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen" because he was entirely innocent of heart when he asked those four creeped-out mothers in the park if he could please tickle their kids. He just likes to play "tickle monster," and what's wrong with that, he asks. Belleville News-Democrat
Comments 'charles_douglas'

Colloidal silver back in the news
A New York woman just took her case public to warn others who, like her, are prone to gulp any old thing someone recommends. If you take it for a long time, it will turn your skin permanently gray/blue (among other effects). Fella named Paul Karason took his case public last yr, and, as you can see, he's pretty much a freak, but (1) still, he has a girlfriend and (2) she's a tribute to post-racial America because she says she doesn't even notice the color of his skin. Karason said he'd learned his lesson . . uh, in that he doesn't take as much colloidal silver as he used to. (Another blue man was the 2002 U.S. Senate candidate from Montana, Stan Jones, of the Libertarian Party, of course, who had started gulping it in 1999 to prepare for the new world disorder that would ensue following Y2K.) Fox News // Fox News (Karason) // CNN (Jones)
Comments 'colloidal_silver'

Signed a waiver of liability to get on a mechanical bull? No problem, suing anyway
I was drunk at the time, said wannabe-broncbuster and "Manhattan screenwriter" Aaron Schnore, 38, so I didn't know what I was signing, and I certainly didn't notice that warning sign, so how am I supposed to know not to ride it drunk? New York Daily News
Comments 'aaron_schnore'

News that sounds like a joke: British Christians are taking classes in how to improve their interpersonal techniques
They don't know how to flirt or to read "signals." Included in a list of suggested (or discouraged) pick-up lines (that may or not be made up by the Daily Telegraph): "Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives—he never met you"; "It's a sin to look as good as you"; "I just don't feel called to celibacy"; "You float my ark." Daily Telegraph
Comments 'christian_pickup'

Your Daily Loser
Antonio Vasquez, 22, Fresno, Calif., burglarized a home while two people were asleep, and took some money, but somehow lost his pants and wallet in the process, and by the time he departed, one resident had kitchen spices smeared all over his body and the other had been beaten with a sausage. [Ed.: I just report 'em, people.] Fresno Bee
Comments 'antonio_vasquez'

People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
TV reporter Chiu Yu-kit, 31, was fired after his arrest for standing naked on a double-decker bus and diddling himself as it cruised its route through downtown Hong Kong. Agence France-Presse via Yahoo
Comments 'chiu_yukit'

Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
Timothy John Case, 40, who police say might have abducted two women in Ann Arbor, Mich. WDIV-TV (Detroit)
Comments 'timothy_case'

More Things to Worry About on Monday
Well, ya can worry about the ridiculous, monster-size squash that this guy in England grew (although the lady holding it over her shoulder looks pretty happy) . . . . . The Orlando-area's newest tourist attraction is the home of Ms. Casey Anthony (suspected by some in the death of her missing tot Caylee), but the neighbors are fed up with all those out-of-towners' bumper-to-bumper traffic . . . . . IRS to Richard Mellor of Marion, Iowa: "No, the United States is not a 'fictional entity,' and you, as a 'citizen of heaven,' are not exempt from federal taxes" . . . . . As Iraqis finally emerge from their homes after three yrs of holing up, some suddenly realize that, jeez, they look so awful that they might need that stomach-banding surgery (like this guy). Today's Newsrangers: Steve Miller, Jerry Whittle, Cindy Hildebrand, Stan Adams, Joe Wilson, Charles Applegate, Pierre Langenegger, Candy Clouston
Comments 'worry_080908'

Posted By: Chuck - Mon Sep 08, 2008 - Comments (0)
Category:

Giant Spider Roams Streets of Liverpool!

Posted By: Paul - Sun Sep 07, 2008 - Comments (0)
Category: Aliens, Art, Performance Art, Entertainment, Horror, Inventions, Parades and Festivals, Pets, Technology, Toys, Foreign Customs, Science Fiction

Follies of the Mad Men #24

And now, something different for this series: a video titled DESIGN FOR DREAMING.

Posted By: Paul - Sun Sep 07, 2008 - Comments (4)
Category: Business, Advertising, Products, Domestic, Fashion, Futurism, Inventions, Technology, Sex Symbols, 1950s, Cars

Guess the Scientist!

What famous Victorian-era scientist does this passage describe? (Follow the "extended" link for the answer.)

He suffered from incessant retching or vomiting, usually brought on by fatigue; and from painful bouts of wind that churned around after meals and obliged him to sit quietly in a private room until his body behaved more politely. Reading between the lines, his guts were noisy and smelly. "I feel nearly sure that the air is generated somewhere lower down than stomach," he told one doctor plaintively in 1865, "and as soon as it regurgitates into the stomach the discomfort comes on." He was equally forthright with his cousin...: "all excitement & fatigue brings on such dreadful flatulence that in fact I can go nowhere." When he did go somewhere, he needed privacy after meals, "for, as you know, my odious stomach requires that."

He also had trouble with his bowels, frequently suffering from constipation and vulnerable to the obsession with regularity that stalked most Victorians. He developed crops of boils in what he called "perfectly devilish attacks" on his backside, making it impossible to sit upright, and occasional eczema. There were headaches and giddiness. He probably had piles as well.

More in extended >>

Posted By: Alex - Sun Sep 07, 2008 - Comments (2)
Category: Medicine, Quizzes, Guess the Scientist, Science

Black Magic Woman

Now it can be told!

Carlos Santana and Col. Muammar el-Qaddafi are one and the same person!

Check out the identical looks to the right! But if seeing is not believing, further proof is offered in this article from today's New York Times, in which "Qaddafi" rhapsodizes about his favorite babe Condoleezza Rice in unmistakeably lyrical terms:

After all, the Libyan leader had professed his “love” for the American secretary of state. “I support my darling black African woman,” Colonel Qaddafi told the network Al Jazeera last year. “I admire and am very proud of the way she leans back and gives orders to the Arab leaders.”

He continued: “Yes, Leezza, Leezza, Leezza... I love her very much.”

Posted By: Paul - Sat Sep 06, 2008 - Comments (2)
Category: Celebrities, Drugs, Government, Officials, Music, Sex Symbols, Foreign Customs, Hair Styling, Facial Hair

Bacon Beans

A week or so ago, Alex told us how to make our own Baconhenge. But perhaps that's not enough bacon for you. In that case, why not nosh on some Bacon Beans as a snack?

Posted By: Paul - Sat Sep 06, 2008 - Comments (3)
Category: Animals, Food

Chuck’s Hand-Picked Overnight Weird News for Saturday

Update: Swaziland's King Mswati continues to live large in a dirt-poor nation (and his people love it)
To celebrate turning the big-4-oh, he had a 15,000-seat stadium built and ordered BMWs for visiting dignitaries. Forbes estimates he's worth $200m and skims millions a yr from the gov't and business. He has made News of the Weird several times, e.g., his 5-yr ban on all sex by virgin women (to reduce the sky-high HIV rate) (didn't work) (and personally he promptly broke the rule, anyway) (but he paid the fine, which was one cow). In a new documentary, he admits that poverty makes him "sad" and that "sometimes . . you wish to help them but the funds are always not enough." No matter. Even his critics agree that he is seriously beloved, even by the beggars. New York Times
Comments 'mswati_40'

Your Daily Loser
Patrick Dodenhoff, 39, charged with flashing people on a couple of California beaches, was actually arrested while hiding in the brush at "Pirate's Cove," which is a locally-well-known nude beach. (Seriously.) Monterey County Herald
Comments 'patrick_dodenhoff'

Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
Jesus Perez, 71, charged with killing a homeless man in Miami. WPLG-TV (Miami)
Comments 'jesus_perez'

More Things to Worry About on Saturday
The suburban-Pittsburgh couple weren't running a swingers' club out of the private home in the nice neighborhood but had actually been operating, in that home, for 7 yrs, Saturday night church services, where congregants went at it religiously . . . . . It's Good to Be a British Prisoner (continuing series): Why, this guy, whose sentence was up 2 yrs ago, still refuses to leave! . . . . . Fine Points of the Law: The Iowa Supreme Court tossed out a conviction for "indecent exposure" against a guy caught at night outside women's windows moaning and with baby oil on his hands; the justices pointed out that, after all, no one actually saw his stuff. Today's Newsrangers: Cindy Hildebrand, Bobby Stout
Comments 'worry_080906'

Posted By: Chuck - Sat Sep 06, 2008 - Comments (0)
Category:

One Touch of Homer Makes the Whole World Kin

In this NEW YORK TIMES article from today, scientists reveal their latest findings about which brain cells are excited during the recall of memories, and how closely memory tallies with literally re-enacting the events. And they use a tantalizing example:

After briefly distracting the patients, the researchers then asked them to think about the clips for a minute and to report “what comes to mind.” The patients remembered almost all of the clips. And when they recalled a specific one — say, a clip of Homer Simpson — the same cells that had been active during the Homer clip reignited. In fact, the cells became active a second or two before people were conscious of the memory, which signaled to researchers the memory to come.

Why is Homer Simpson singled out as the test case? Obviously because the human brain has specific neurons that emulate or actually induce and compel Homer-Simpson-style behavior.

And there in a nutshell you have the whole basis for ninety-nine percent of the contents of WEIRD UNIVERSE.

Posted By: Paul - Fri Sep 05, 2008 - Comments (13)
Category: Celebrities, Science, Experiments, Psychology, Stupidity, Television, Husbands, Cartoons