No Smoking in Bismarck, North Dakota

And they mean it, too. Ron White, the popular comedian from the Blue Collar Comedy tour and various Comedy Central specials, is a whiskey-drinking, cigar-smoking redneck, and proud of it. He's included those two fundamental elements in all of his shows. But apparently grumpy people in North Dakota won't stand for that kind of blatant disregard for the law. This is one of those times where you wonder just how uptight Americans have become since Janet Jackson flashed a tit on prime time.

Posted By: Nethie - Wed May 20, 2009 - Comments (6)
Category: Crime, Drugs, Smoking and Tobacco, Comedians

Weird… Handbags?

New research out this week says that women's handbags are getting bigger, and so are providing bigger rewards for criminals. Most worryingly, according to ID fraud experts CPP, these larger bags are encouraging women to carry around personal documents such as their passport, bank statements or payslips that are indispensable to an identity thief, leading to an increase in cases of bag theft. And it's not just women at risk, the same research also reveals that 1-in-10 men now tote a "man-bag", most with personal documents inside (Telegraph).

Unfortunately, the advice to keep an eye on your handbag came too late for one member of the UK's "Serious Organised Crime Agency" (a sort of British FBI). On arriving at the main airport in Bogota, Colombia, to gather information on the drug cartels there, the unnamed agent managed to lose her handbag, and with it the memory-stick she was carrying containing the names and addresses of dozens of SOCA's informants and operatives. According to sources the agent is "a lovely girl but a bit daft and scatterbrained", just the sort of person to be transporting information vital to your country's war on drugs then (The Australian).

Of course, it's not always what's taken out of your handbag that can get you into trouble. A Melbourne woman faces five years in a Thailand jail for stealing a beermat, even though two people have come forward and testified that she is innocent and they hid the mat in her handbag. The woman's lawyer has appealed to the Prime Minister of Thailand to intervene in the case (ABC News).

Somehow I don't think the same excuse would work for Teresa Tambunting though. Tambunting, who worked for Jacmel Jewelry in New York, is alleged to have fashioned a hidden pocket in the lining of her handbag and smuggled out over $12 million in gold over the course of 5 years. Surprisingly, money doesn't seem to have been the motive, and soon after the company began an investigation into the higher than expected "manufacturing losses", Tambunting returned a suitcase containing 66lbs of gold pellets. Police later recovered another 447lbs from her Scarsdale home (The Times).

But even loaded with gold, Mrs Tambunting's handbags would fare a poor second in value to those of a certain Mrs Beckham. Victoria "Posh" Beckham, perhaps in a bid to be to handbags what Imelda Marcos was to shoes, has amassed an incredible collection of over 100 designer handbags. Specifically, they are all by one designer, Hermès, and all of one design, his extremely desirable (apparently) "Birkin" model, named for actress Jane Birkin, which start from around $7000 a piece. Beckham's entire collection, which she refers to as "an investment", is worth an estimated $2.3 million (Female First).

Posted By: Dumbfounded - Tue May 19, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category: Crime, Fashion, Law, Diplomacy and Foreign Relations, Goofs and Screw-ups

One For You, One Hundred For Me…

The justice system in Lancashire UK have struck a blow for the consumer by jailing a prolific eBay scammer and fining him over £100,000, but just one thousand of this will be used to pay back his victims. Jonathan Hartley was jailed for 18 months after a Police investigation looked into complaints going back over six years. In court Hartley pleaded guilty to multiple counts of fraud (and one of money laundering), which are believed to have netted him over £140,000.

Taking into account the money he has already spent, Lancashire Crown Court have ordered he raise the £102,000 fine by August or face another 12 months on his sentence and the £102k fine (plus interest). Because only 34 victims have been positively identified, less than a thousand of this 'restitution' will be paid out in compensation. The rest will be split equally between the prosecutors (government), the courts and the police (Pendle Today).

Posted By: Dumbfounded - Tue May 19, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category: Cops, Crime, Frauds, Cons and Scams, Government, Law

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 19th

Your Daily Loser - Michael Tiernan said "If I get fired or lose my job, nobody is coming out of this building alive." Why was he so upset? He was suspended from his janitorial job in a Washington County school for chasing another employee around with a snake. The Story.

Jury Duty - Yet another genius criminal who gives himself away by leaving his name at the scene. Only this time, Dustin Craig Borders signed a bible, because the crime scene was the Kingsley United Methodist Church in Sullivan, Indiana. The Story and Mugshot.

Posted By: Nethie - Tue May 19, 2009 - Comments (1)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Goofs and Screw-ups

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 18th

Your Daily Loser - In case you were wondering, it's not really water inside Old Faithful. The Old Faithful geyser in Yellowstone National Park has a webcam. But viewers got a different kind of eyeful a few days ago when two summer employees were caught urinating into the geyser. The Story.

Jury Duty - Carl Cornelle Jr. has been in and out of court for the last ten years, since he killed Arlene Miske in a head-on car accident. Carl was under the influence of drugs and alcohol and was originally convicted for negligent homicide. But he's still not in prison, is still addicted to drugs and even applied for a driver's license recently even though it was revoked for life after the accident. The Story.

Posted By: Nethie - Mon May 18, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Alcohol, Goofs and Screw-ups

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 17th

Your Daily Loser - How drunk do you have to be to think that your town's water tower is a threat? Raymond Maresh of Garfield, Arkansas, was arrested for firing three rounds at the water tower, causing it to spring a leak and doing $15,000.00 worth of damage. The Story.

Jury Duty - Customer: Excuse me, kindly Mr. Radio Shack Employee, I would like to return this item. I have a receipt and I am within my 30 days and...
Employee: No.
Customer: Might I speak with a manager, please?
Employee: I don't like your attitude. *punches customer in face until cops arrive*
Sad, but true. The Story and Mugshot.

Posted By: Nethie - Sun May 17, 2009 - Comments (1)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Goofs and Screw-ups

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 16th

Your Daily Loser - Don't Ask, Don'T Tell should be mandatory everywhere, not just in the military. Brandon Vongthongthrip was recently arrested for admitting that he has had sex with his pit bull more than four hundred times. He is being held for 1.5 million dollars in bail. The Story.

Jury Duty - I wonder if he really is. He does look kinda sleepy ... Gerald Soundsleeper pleaded no contest to manslaughter in the death of his girlfriend. The Story.

Posted By: Nethie - Sat May 16, 2009 - Comments (1)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Goofs and Screw-ups

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 14th

Your Daily Loser - Make a note, gentlemen. When you are asked to leave a bar because you are behaving badly, just leave. Don't copy Graham Brunson of Naples, Florida. Mr. Brunson decided to show his displeasure by urinating on the bar. The cops were called, Brunson ran, the cops gave chase, and... rearranged his face. The Story. (includes Mugshot!)

Jury Duty - Beer-Pong goes horribly wrong. Joseph Jiminez shot and killed his friend when dared to during an argument over a game of beer-pong. The Story. I especially like how the reporter takes the time to explain what beer-pong is.

Posted By: Nethie - Thu May 14, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Alcohol, Goofs and Screw-ups

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 13th

Your Daily Loser - A Palm Beach, Florida, woman says she deliberately rammed her boyfriend's truck with her own car to prevent him from driving while drunk. Even better, she had her two children in the car with her when she did it. She's been charged with aggravated battery and two counts of child abuse. The Story.

Jury Duty - A big name for a big boy. Mr. Franklin Santiagomontenegro was arrested for contributing to the deliquency of a minor and selling/using cocaine. The Story. I feel sorry for the arresting officer: "Sir, I need you to spell your name." "S A N..." twenty minutes later "...G R O"

Posted By: Nethie - Wed May 13, 2009 - Comments (2)
Category: Crime, Drugs, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Goofs and Screw-ups

Driving Drunk in Norway is Costly

The Norwegian courts base criminal fines on the amount of money the offender has. Recently a 49 year old gentleman from Kristiansand, Norway, was fined $109,000.00 for driving under the influence. The Story. Can you imagine trying to adjust such a system to be used in the US? I think it's a great idea but I'm afraid that our most frequent offenders are flat broke to start with.

Posted By: Nethie - Tue May 12, 2009 - Comments (2)
Category: Crime, Your Daily Loser, Alcohol, Goofs and Screw-ups