Cattle Princesses

I never did understand why cows and beauty contests are often linked. It's probably a throwback to ancient pagan fertility rites. Below are the six young women who hoped to become the 1975 Kern County Cattle Princess. I don't know who won.

And below that are the young women who currently serve as California Dairy Princesses.

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Alex Boese Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes. Paul Di Filippo Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over forty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. Contact Us

Posted By: Alex - Thu Aug 08, 2013
Category: Beauty, Ugliness and Other Aesthetic Issues | Contests, Races and Other Competitions | Farming

Comments

Alex, lets start at the beginning....

This traveling salesman goes up to the farm house and asks if he can spend the night. The farmer agrees but warns the salesman not to be a'messin' with his daughter.

Got it? Farm girls are HEALTHY and know ALL ABOUT what makes critters happy.

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 08/08/13 at 11:15 AM

Like Al Bundy said anout marriage: "Why go out for milk when you got a cow at home." 😊

Posted by Raylcc on 08/08/13 at 11:41 AM

Reminds me of the "The Rutabaga Story" episode from "Green Acres" where Lisa is the de facto "Rutabaga Queen of Hooterville."

Posted by KDP on 08/08/13 at 05:51 PM

I don't know if I would want to be the Queen Cow.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 08/08/13 at 06:57 PM

Patty, how could you turn down the title of "Queen Cow Patty" ???

Posted by Frank on 08/09/13 at 01:24 AM

Obviously the connection is... teats. Am I wrong?

Posted by Parker Sheaffer on 08/09/13 at 07:38 PM

Naw, if that were the case then there'd have to be 2 queens per contest. Just to get things to even out.

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 08/10/13 at 12:12 AM

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