News of the Weird / Plus, June 2, 2015
News of the Weird / Plus
June 2, 2015 (Part 2) [weird stuff that made me excited (frightened) (ROTFL) (appalled) last week, some of which will appear in News of the Weird soon] [Part 1 on Monday, Part 2 on Tuesday]
Pointless: Not drawing much venture-capital interest: (1) a Canadian software engineer’s machine that unspools toilet paper exactly three squares at a time; (2) a Japanese shoulder-mounted tomato-feeder that provides nourishment to marathoners; (3) Google software engineer Maurice Bos’s whiteboard-mounted clock that writes down the exact time, with a marker, at five-minute intervals (after erasing the previous time). Popular Science
Radio Free Europe (perhaps not the most unbiased authority) cites reports that some young ISIS rookies are complaining that nepotism is so bad they can’t even sign up for suicide missions, because of the waiting list (though the list is shorter in Iraq than Syria). News.com.au (Sydney)
America is a country of second chances . . or in the case of stockbroker Jerry Cicolani Jr., 67 chances. But, oh, that 68th. That’s what did him in. New York Times
Awkward (I): Just as Akron, Ohio, police were searching suspected drug-dealer Andrew Palmer’s home, a UPS driver knocked on the door with what turned out to be another pounds of dope. Cleveland.com
Awkward (II): Corey Huddleston, 52, really wanted to find that teen-age girl he fancied--even though her dad was in the home. Once ejected, he went around back through a window and, in the dark, accidentally groped the dad. WKRN-TV (Nashville)
Brain Care: The bad news is that a surgery center in Louisville, Ky., which was supposed to safekeep the part of the brain of a tumor patient, um, lost it; they were supposed to put it back into his head, eventually. But there’s good news for Ms. Leigh Erceg, 47, who had a traumatic brain injury in 2009 but now has acquired a sophistication about art, poetry, and high-level math (“acquired savant syndrome”)--and, simultaneously, synesthesia, which is an overlapping of the senses, i.e., sort of a permanent LSD trip. WKYT-TV (Lexington) /// United Press International
A seller at the Traders Village flea market in San Antonio was offering ladies souvenir sonograms on DVD for $35 until some authorities paid them a visit. [ed. Never had a sonogram, myself, but reporter Madalyn Mendoza might have, yet she didn’t seem to supply information about whether it was a real sonogram or just some doohickies that returned an image that was captured in a screen shot.] Express-News (San Antonio)
The Yunessan Spa House in Hakone, Japan, has begun offering particularly-Japanesy warm spa baths--in a tub of ramen pork broth with noodles (fake noodles, because real ones would be illegal for some reason). Metro News (London)
June 2, 2015 (Part 2) [weird stuff that made me excited (frightened) (ROTFL) (appalled) last week, some of which will appear in News of the Weird soon] [Part 1 on Monday, Part 2 on Tuesday]
Pointless: Not drawing much venture-capital interest: (1) a Canadian software engineer’s machine that unspools toilet paper exactly three squares at a time; (2) a Japanese shoulder-mounted tomato-feeder that provides nourishment to marathoners; (3) Google software engineer Maurice Bos’s whiteboard-mounted clock that writes down the exact time, with a marker, at five-minute intervals (after erasing the previous time). Popular Science
Radio Free Europe (perhaps not the most unbiased authority) cites reports that some young ISIS rookies are complaining that nepotism is so bad they can’t even sign up for suicide missions, because of the waiting list (though the list is shorter in Iraq than Syria). News.com.au (Sydney)
America is a country of second chances . . or in the case of stockbroker Jerry Cicolani Jr., 67 chances. But, oh, that 68th. That’s what did him in. New York Times
Awkward (I): Just as Akron, Ohio, police were searching suspected drug-dealer Andrew Palmer’s home, a UPS driver knocked on the door with what turned out to be another pounds of dope. Cleveland.com
Awkward (II): Corey Huddleston, 52, really wanted to find that teen-age girl he fancied--even though her dad was in the home. Once ejected, he went around back through a window and, in the dark, accidentally groped the dad. WKRN-TV (Nashville)
Brain Care: The bad news is that a surgery center in Louisville, Ky., which was supposed to safekeep the part of the brain of a tumor patient, um, lost it; they were supposed to put it back into his head, eventually. But there’s good news for Ms. Leigh Erceg, 47, who had a traumatic brain injury in 2009 but now has acquired a sophistication about art, poetry, and high-level math (“acquired savant syndrome”)--and, simultaneously, synesthesia, which is an overlapping of the senses, i.e., sort of a permanent LSD trip. WKYT-TV (Lexington) /// United Press International
A seller at the Traders Village flea market in San Antonio was offering ladies souvenir sonograms on DVD for $35 until some authorities paid them a visit. [ed. Never had a sonogram, myself, but reporter Madalyn Mendoza might have, yet she didn’t seem to supply information about whether it was a real sonogram or just some doohickies that returned an image that was captured in a screen shot.] Express-News (San Antonio)
The Yunessan Spa House in Hakone, Japan, has begun offering particularly-Japanesy warm spa baths--in a tub of ramen pork broth with noodles (fake noodles, because real ones would be illegal for some reason). Metro News (London)
Comments
Ah the old rubber noodle gag. Does the house blow them up or can the patron do it himself?
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 06/02/15 at 12:02 PM
ISIS- If we drop a few bombs on their training place they get their wish and innocent people who DO NOT want to die get their wish too win/win.
Stock broker- Damn, he got more chances than drunk drivers do!
Drugs- Bad timing!
Old groper- ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!
Lost tissue- Were I in this man's place I'd be reticent to continue the treatment. I'd worry about what they were putting back in me if they really lost the specimen and just wanted to avoid the lawsuit. Bet the doc who told the guy is working somewhere else now.
Savant- Amazing, I hope she is happy in her new life.
Flea Market sonogram- Yea, cuz the flea market is the first place I think of when I think of quality prenatal care.
Pork broth bath- GROSS!!!!
Stock broker- Damn, he got more chances than drunk drivers do!
Drugs- Bad timing!
Old groper- ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!
Lost tissue- Were I in this man's place I'd be reticent to continue the treatment. I'd worry about what they were putting back in me if they really lost the specimen and just wanted to avoid the lawsuit. Bet the doc who told the guy is working somewhere else now.
Savant- Amazing, I hope she is happy in her new life.
Flea Market sonogram- Yea, cuz the flea market is the first place I think of when I think of quality prenatal care.
Pork broth bath- GROSS!!!!
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 06/03/15 at 04:34 PM
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