Oh The Wonders Of Chocolate

This tip was told to me by a customer at my workplace. If you have a bruise you want to have fade quickly, melt some chocolate and cover the bruise with it. Put a bandage on the site overnight, remove it and wash (lick?) off the chocolate the next morning. The bruise will then, according to her story, be noticeably lighter. I thought this was just an old wives tale so when I got home I looked it up on the internet. Much to my surprise I discovered that the cure is touted on a number of sites. Chocolate, the food of the Gods, is there anything it can't do!

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Alex Boese Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes. Paul Di Filippo Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over forty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. Contact Us

Posted By: Alex - Mon Oct 17, 2011
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Comments

Don't know if I could bear to waste chocolate this way though. What say you Expat?

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 10/17/11 at 09:21 AM

I imagine if I had chocolate on a bruise, it'd be mysteriously gone the next morning, unless of course I wasn't flexible enough (in which case I'd just be mysteriously sore and tired...)

Posted by jswolf19 in Japan on 10/17/11 at 10:02 AM

Obviously, Patty, your friend (and those poor souls on the internet) have been lead astray by Beelzebub and his dark minions. Chocolate is not to be wasted on cosmetic enhancements!

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 10/17/11 at 11:14 AM

I remember witch hazel! I had a peek at it in Wikipedia and it seems that it does, in fact, have some medicinal properties. Not as many as Windex but still an impressive list.

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 10/17/11 at 11:36 AM

Actually BD, raw bacon is good for drawing splinters and such out as well as drawing a boil to a head.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 10/17/11 at 09:02 PM

White vinegar and news paper cleans windows/glass.

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 10/17/11 at 11:55 PM

Gee! I can't remember the last time I did a douche. 😖

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 10/18/11 at 02:39 AM

I never heard of that one Guest, very interesting.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 10/18/11 at 08:35 AM

I have a friend who is partial to hot toddies Scout, she uses ginger brandy. Guest, that sounds delicious, but for sipping only.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 10/18/11 at 05:16 PM

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