Shlongs, Buffaloes, Shlongs, More Shlongs
and the Morning Edition of Chuck's News of the Weird Daily for Thursday (and, I'm sorry to report, there's still a scarcity of non-uplifting-political news, meaning no Afternoon Edition today, either)
It's good to be a British prisoner (as we all know from News of the Weird), but it's even better to be a British academic convicted of possessing child porn
Dr. Nicholas Hammond, 45, of Cambridge Univ., convicted of having more than 1,000 boy-porn images, will not go to jail (but will have "restrictions"), and hence, Cambridge will take him back starting in April (with more "restrictions"). "[Y]ou were seeking refuge from life in a halcyon part of your youth, relived by looking at low-level [but pornographic] images of boys," said an exceedingly sympathetic judge (who was, go figure, a Cambridge U. graduate!). Daily Mail
Comments 'nicholas_hammond'
Our favorite nation of Bhutan (which measures "gross national happiness") has a new king
Well, it's the incumbent king's son, both being members of the Wangchuck (no relation) dynasty. (Bonus: Bhutan originally broke in to News of the Weird because of its historical fascination with fertility gods and the surviving plethora of penile images in its culture.) Bloomberg News /// NOTW 904 (5-29-2005)
Comments 'king_wangchuck'
Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
Jonathan Wood, 39, couldn't possibly have killed his own mother, could he? Chicago Tribune
Comments 'jonathan_wood'
More Things to Worry About on Thursday
Just his time to go: A crew of New Zealand farmers tracked down a marauding water buffalo, but one of their rifle shots missed, hit a tree, and ricocheted approximately into the brain of another of the crew, sitting in a utility vehicle. New Zealand Herald
Robert Aldrich was locked up for several months on a robbery charge that ultimately went nowhere, and he claimed compensation from the state for lost income, but his normal day job was "con man." Boston Globe
Update: a $170k settlement by the state of Oklahoma to that court reporter who was fired for squealing on the judge who used the penis pump during four trials. Tulsa World /// Associated Press via MSNBC (background)
The latest female stone-the-rape-victim death (under Muslim Sharia): a 13-year-old girl in Somalia, in front of 1,000 pious spectators. BBC News
Update: San Francisco voters turned down the proposal to name a waste-treatment facility The George W. Bush Sewage Plant. San Francisco Chronicle
Wall Street money cowboys' year-end bonuses will surely be down this time, from 20 percent to as much as 70 percent, but what American taxpayers want to know is: Bonuses? WTF? RUSM? New York Times
Today's Newsrangers: Michael Buck, Candy Clouston
Comments on More Things to Worry About on Thursday?
Comments 'worry_081106'
It's good to be a British prisoner (as we all know from News of the Weird), but it's even better to be a British academic convicted of possessing child porn
Dr. Nicholas Hammond, 45, of Cambridge Univ., convicted of having more than 1,000 boy-porn images, will not go to jail (but will have "restrictions"), and hence, Cambridge will take him back starting in April (with more "restrictions"). "[Y]ou were seeking refuge from life in a halcyon part of your youth, relived by looking at low-level [but pornographic] images of boys," said an exceedingly sympathetic judge (who was, go figure, a Cambridge U. graduate!). Daily Mail
Comments 'nicholas_hammond'
Our favorite nation of Bhutan (which measures "gross national happiness") has a new king
Well, it's the incumbent king's son, both being members of the Wangchuck (no relation) dynasty. (Bonus: Bhutan originally broke in to News of the Weird because of its historical fascination with fertility gods and the surviving plethora of penile images in its culture.) Bloomberg News /// NOTW 904 (5-29-2005)
Comments 'king_wangchuck'
Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
Jonathan Wood, 39, couldn't possibly have killed his own mother, could he? Chicago Tribune
Comments 'jonathan_wood'
More Things to Worry About on Thursday
Just his time to go: A crew of New Zealand farmers tracked down a marauding water buffalo, but one of their rifle shots missed, hit a tree, and ricocheted approximately into the brain of another of the crew, sitting in a utility vehicle. New Zealand Herald
Robert Aldrich was locked up for several months on a robbery charge that ultimately went nowhere, and he claimed compensation from the state for lost income, but his normal day job was "con man." Boston Globe
Update: a $170k settlement by the state of Oklahoma to that court reporter who was fired for squealing on the judge who used the penis pump during four trials. Tulsa World /// Associated Press via MSNBC (background)
The latest female stone-the-rape-victim death (under Muslim Sharia): a 13-year-old girl in Somalia, in front of 1,000 pious spectators. BBC News
Update: San Francisco voters turned down the proposal to name a waste-treatment facility The George W. Bush Sewage Plant. San Francisco Chronicle
Wall Street money cowboys' year-end bonuses will surely be down this time, from 20 percent to as much as 70 percent, but what American taxpayers want to know is: Bonuses? WTF? RUSM? New York Times
Today's Newsrangers: Michael Buck, Candy Clouston
Comments on More Things to Worry About on Thursday?
Comments 'worry_081106'
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