Sick Raccoons=Delayed Flights

JFK International Airport has been having a lot of trouble with turtles on the tarmac since 2009. After extensive study they have figured out what caused such an over abundance of turtles. In 2008 distemper decimated the raccoon population at the wildlife refuge and raccoons prey heavily on turtles. The raccoons are catching up now and the turtle population is more controlled, so maybe flights will not get delayed at least not for THAT reason.

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Alex Boese Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes. Paul Di Filippo Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over forty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. Contact Us

Posted By: Alex - Mon Jul 07, 2014
Category: Animals

Comments

Kinda like the butterfly effect.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 07/07/14 at 07:55 PM

These are obviously terrorist Islamic turtles and must be stopped by the TSA.

Posted by BrokeDad in Midwest US on 07/07/14 at 08:40 PM

Strip search them all!!!

And, who's REALLY behind those masks?

Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 07/08/14 at 12:23 AM

From the turtles point of view, it's the planes and raccoons that are the problem. 😊

Posted by BMN on 07/08/14 at 06:11 AM

BD: No, you don't get the Homeland Security reasoning. Your suggestion is far too sane. The raccoons are obviously terrorist Islamic raccoons and must be eradicated. That'll make life safer for both good, honest Ahmurican turtles, and airline passengers all over the world.

Oh, and they must be made to turn on their mobile phone. No mobile phone, no raccoon.

Posted by Richard Bos on 07/08/14 at 07:26 AM

I said it before in that Terrapin post and now the Raccoons agree!
Turtles are yummy!!! :lol: :coolsmile:

Posted by Tyrusguy on 07/08/14 at 09:43 AM

So JFK just needs to let people like Ty in to gather up the turtles for food. The excess ones could go to soup kitchens.

Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 07/08/14 at 08:11 PM

@Patty, I like turtle soup a lot! But, not enough to dodge jumbo jets to collect the ingredients! :lol: :coolsmile: :coolsmile:

Posted by Tyrusguy on 07/09/14 at 08:49 AM

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