Time Management by Jonathon Keats
Artist Jonathon Keats, whose career we've been watching for some time here at WU, has sent us a personalized email to let us know of his latest project. Which means he knows we're watching him, and he's watching us back. It's like a closed circle of weirdness!
His latest project involves time management. Traditionally this involves being managed "by corporate decree or motivational techniques." But his idea is to manage time itself using the principles of relativity.
It's known that gravity warps the fabric of time, so that time runs slower for objects near a high-gravity object (such as a star or planet) relative to an object not near such an object. So he's formed a company, Spacetime Industries, which is selling a "time ingot" that can be placed beside your bed or on your desk for "temporal micromanagement."
The ingot is made of a "high-density alloy that warps the four-dimensional fabric of the universe" that slows time for those in its vicinity. How much slower? You'll gain an extra second of time every billion years. And this extra second will only cost you $29.99.
Keats is holding a special event on Sep 26th at the Modernism Gallery in San Francisco to demonstrate the use of time ingots and answer questions. You can read more about his project here [PDF].
His latest project involves time management. Traditionally this involves being managed "by corporate decree or motivational techniques." But his idea is to manage time itself using the principles of relativity.
It's known that gravity warps the fabric of time, so that time runs slower for objects near a high-gravity object (such as a star or planet) relative to an object not near such an object. So he's formed a company, Spacetime Industries, which is selling a "time ingot" that can be placed beside your bed or on your desk for "temporal micromanagement."
The ingot is made of a "high-density alloy that warps the four-dimensional fabric of the universe" that slows time for those in its vicinity. How much slower? You'll gain an extra second of time every billion years. And this extra second will only cost you $29.99.
Keats is holding a special event on Sep 26th at the Modernism Gallery in San Francisco to demonstrate the use of time ingots and answer questions. You can read more about his project here [PDF].
Comments
I have them that will give you 2 seconds every million years for only $19.99
Only 200 available in a limited edition. These are selling fast. Get yours now while you can before they are all gone !!!
email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
(also available through Paul, Alex, Expat47, and Patty)
Only 200 available in a limited edition. These are selling fast. Get yours now while you can before they are all gone !!!
email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
(also available through Paul, Alex, Expat47, and Patty)
Posted by BrokeDad in Midwest US on 09/14/13 at 12:38 PM
I'm keeping them all around me to stay youthful!!!
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 09/14/13 at 12:57 PM
If I gain another 3 pounds I can do without any external source to gain my extra seconds!
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 09/14/13 at 01:01 PM
time already slows in the vicinity of people dense enough to want to buy one of these.
Posted by meltemi on 09/14/13 at 01:11 PM
Sweet, My pet rock really needs one of these. There is no better gift to give then the gift of longer life after all.
Posted by Fluffy Bunny Slippers on 09/14/13 at 05:59 PM
Gravity drops off as the square of the distance. So hug your partner tight tonight and you both will live 1/gazillion seconds longer.
Posted by BMN on 09/14/13 at 08:04 PM
31,556,900 seconds in a year, so 31,556,900 x 1,000,000,000 of these would make time stand still.
Don't have to worry about the cost -- with time stopped, the bank would never open, so they couldn't cash my check.
Have to get them to deliver some Monday morning when everyone else has to go to work, but I'm free to sleep late.
Don't have to worry about the cost -- with time stopped, the bank would never open, so they couldn't cash my check.
Have to get them to deliver some Monday morning when everyone else has to go to work, but I'm free to sleep late.
Posted by Phideaux on 09/15/13 at 03:28 AM
You don't gain any time, as everything runs minutely slower. So you live the same number of years. Other people just perceive those years as more
Posted by Ed on 09/15/13 at 04:59 PM
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Category: Art