and the Afternoon Edition of Chuck's News of the Weird Daily for Friday
A 22-yr-veteran cop (considered "the mayor of 26th Street" by grateful residents) was fired after taking
one bag of trail mix too many from a Walgreen's.
Chicago Tribune
It was just her time to go: fatally struck by a car in a parking lot (estimated speed:
"2" or "3" mph).
The Oregonian
Chubby Mikey's nude 2009 calendar is officially sold out, he said, being a best buy in the "chubby chaser" community (with "chubby" in this case meaning "530 pounds").
Daily Telegraph (London)
[photos are probably safe for work, but that doesn't mean you want to see 'em]
A Wisconsin girl, 10, precociously developing her own
hit list.
TheSmokingGun.com
Bonus Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
(1) Mr.
Joe Gloria, who might be a dog molester (you are ordered to ignore the fact that he has just recently received a beatdown).
Massachusetts Law Enforcement Network via Fresno Bee
(2) How about
Brian Hansen? If he's the guy the cops want, he offered teenage boys beer if they'd give him photos of their genitals (even though the kids cheated and supplied only Internet porn, instead).
Salt Lake Tribune
(3) Tedrick Garland, 24, accused burglar in Beaumont, Tex. (and if you believe in purity in our justice system, you'll judge Mr. Garland fairly, without regard to his shirt).
Beaumont Enterprise
Editor's Note
It is with a mixture of joy and hesitancy that I inform you that the exciting German tabloid
Bild now has an English-language site. While
Bild is notoriously unreliable for its celebrity reporting, I think most of its news stories are sound. I'll be watching them closely, in any event. Two current local stories of interest: A court in the state of Hessen ruled that
having large breasts is not a medical problem, in that insurance companies are not required to pay for reduction surgery. And police in Bochum, North Rhine-Westphalia, are
pictured in their shrubbery suits, lying in wait for a serial burglar to return to his rural hideaway and pick up his goods (and they got their man).
[Link from Nothing to Do with Arbroath blog]
Professor Music's Weird Link o' the Day
Ya get an idea, ya go with it, no matter what. Renewable energy, horse-drawn carriage, no fouling the streets. In fact, horse-drawn carriage, with the horse in back . . on a treadmill . . generating the power to move the vehicle:
The Naturmobil (1 hp engine).
Today's Newsrangers: Joseph Stanley, Paul Music, Sandy Pearlman, Ginger Katz, Stephen Taylor, Perry Levin, Paul Vogt
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