Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 6th

Your Daily Loser - If the police are kind enough to put your drunken butt into a cab and send you home rather than write you a ticket for being drunk and disorderly, do yourself a huge favor and stay home! Unfortunately this advice comes too late for Erik "Knucklehead" Salmons of Copley, Ohio. Once he arrived home, Salmons thought it over and decided he wasn't too drunk to drive. To prove his point, he drove himself to the police station and insisted on being given a breathalyzer... which he failed. The Story.

Jury Duty - Is it really possible that he smokes pot? It could be that he just sells it, but I have my doubts. Being high as a kite would help to explain the hair. The Mugshot.

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Alex Boese Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes. Paul Di Filippo Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over forty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. Contact Us

Posted By: Nethie - Wed May 06, 2009
Category: Drugs | Your Daily Jury Duty | Your Daily Loser | Goofs and Screw-ups

Comments

Is his pot laced with PCP and cow manure? 🐛

Posted by Matt in Florida on 05/06/09 at 09:48 AM

Jury Duty - I'm all for strange hair, but WTF? You want horns, borrow Flav's helmet! Even the most pathetic Goth or Emo reject wouldn't stoop to that. Guilty on all charges, and just wait till the fashion police charge him!

Posted by DownCrisis on 05/06/09 at 11:47 AM

BTW, here is a Robert Smith with GREAT weird hair...

http://fdba.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/robert_smith.jpg

Posted by DownCrisis on 05/06/09 at 11:51 AM

Hell, even I could make better devil horns with my hair. That infernal idiot is guilty. Damned idiot!

Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 05/06/09 at 12:03 PM

*gasp* I stole from Chuck! ... No, not really. I googled dumb criminals and stupid people for two hours last night and this story stood out because the guy called himself a Knucklehead, and noone uses that word anymore. Which is a shame cause it's a great word.

Posted by Nethie on 05/06/09 at 01:17 PM

Ah, yes, alcohol..our dear acquaintance...our tried-and-true friend...where would be by without yea?

OMG I LOVED the Cure when I was younger and I still listen to them to take me back to the good old days...

Posted by vegas_girl in Vegas Baby!! on 05/06/09 at 05:39 PM

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