Dreaming Of A Weird Christmas!

Christmas is nearly upon us, so the time is at hand where every mall has a Santa in residence, waiting for America’s boys and girls to sit on his knee and make their demands known. But while our own little angels are of course clean and fragrant, who knows what those grubby urchins in front of you are spreading! So this year several professional Santa associations are calling for hand-sanitizer to be installed at grotto entrances and have asked congress to put “Santa” on the priority list for H1N1 vaccinations. After all, you have to look after your elf (Telegraph).

Not requiring a flu jab, but in need of a facelift, was the 66’ fibreglass Santa that has been the centrepiece of Auckland, New Zealand’s Christmas pageant for nearly 50 years. With a droopy winking eye and a gesturing mechanical finger, the jolly red giant was beginning, in the words of one local, to “look a little creepy.” But not anymore, as NZ$100,000 have been spent refurbishing the big guy ahead of this Sunday’s grand unveiling (Reuters).

Someone definitely not in need of a facelift is the recently announced “Hunky Santa of 2009.” Los Angeles mall the Beverley Center first introduced their hunky Santas nine years ago, swapping abs and pecs for the beard and britches. This year north-pole toting poseur is James Ellis, who hopes to encourage people to live more healthily and wants to be a role model for kids by parading his festive physique in a fur-trimmed red vest (LA Times).

All of which is not the sort of thing you’re likely to see during Raleigh, North Carolina’s Christmas parade. So worried are parade organisers that the little ones might be confused by two people dressed in red that they have banned “Mrs. Claus” from participating in costume. They have even asked attendees not to wear Santa-hats in case it distracts attention from the “real” St. Nick (WXII12).

And further killjoyery (?) this week from the Employers Forum on Belief, which has advised company bosses that to close their office over Christmas might be construed as discriminatory, since non-Christian employees must use annual leave for their religious holidays. Instead of emphasising the holiday’s religious nature, say the EFB, management should focus on the cost-effectiveness of the closure as a majority of staff would be absent anyway (ILM).



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Posted By: Dumbfounded - Tue Nov 24, 2009 - Comments (2)
Category: Business, Exercise and Fitness, Feminism, Health, Holidays, Hygiene, Law, Religion, Bodybuilding

Aqua Frolics

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Why not have your Thanksgiving turkey dinner underwater this year?

Posted By: Paul - Wed Nov 11, 2009 - Comments (2)
Category: Animals, Exercise and Fitness, Movies, Documentaries, Recreation, Sports, 1950s

I’m Back!

Hello Weird Universe readers. Some of you may remember back in May when I was posting weird things I found in old magazines, and maybe a few of you were wondering what happened to those posts. Being a college student, I had to go home over the summer, and my parents still don't have an internet connection (technically they have AOL, but that doesn't really count), so I had no way to post anything on Weird Universe for a few months. When I got back to Chicago, it took a while to get settled in, and I finally decided I should start posting again. I will try to post a few things a week from now on.

I feel I should start with one of the most bizarre juxtapositions ever to appear, well, anywhere:


(from the April 1953 issue of Popular Science)

Posted By: Salamander Sam - Sat Oct 03, 2009 - Comments (1)
Category: Exercise and Fitness, War, Advertising, 1950s

Another Helping of Food Related Weirdness - 4

First up, let's take a moment to savour pest control, Texas Style. Farmer Skip Smith, from Dublin, TX, is so fed up with feral hogs busting in to his watermelon patch and eating his crops that he’s fighting back with the aid of night-vision goggles and a silenced, fully automatic machine-gun. “The same thing that our forces use in Iraq, we're just using them on animals," Smith said, “we shoot about 45 to 50 a week on 1000 acres." Which is a hell of a lot of free bacon (ABC).

But if there is one food that might possibly challenge bacon as the mightily meaty master of my heart, it would be southern fried chicken. So what could be better than a sandwich that includes both? Well, how about one that leaves out that pointless bread stuff and puts the slices of gorgeous bacon between two hot, fresh fried chicken fillets? That is the idea behind what some reports are claiming is the latest creation from KFC, the “double-down” sandwich. Bacon, cheese and the “Colonel’s special sauce” are sandwiched between the chain’s house-style fried chicken in a heart-stopping 1200 calorie mouthful. And the day this launches near me officially marks the end of my banana diet (AJC).



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Posted By: Dumbfounded - Wed Aug 26, 2009 - Comments (8)
Category: Agriculture, Animals, Cops, Exercise and Fitness, Food, Candy, Guns

A Little Light Weirdness - 3

Brazilian TV presenter, Wallace Souza, has brought a whole new meaning to the term "hit show", by allegedly arranging the deaths of at least four people to boost the ratings of his mid-day real crime show. Souza, a former policeman and prominent politician, is accused of being behind a criminal drug network with an estimated turnover of $25m a month, while the murder victims were all either partners who had fallen from favour or from rival outfits. Once the hit had been set up, it is claimed Souza would receive a tip-off so that camera crews for his program could reach the scene before even the police (Guardian).

Someone else who may be meeting with an "accident" pretty soon is Ginger the kune-kune pig, who is not in pensioner Anne Moon's best books after swallowing her $2500 dollar diamond engagement ring right off her hand. Mrs. Moon, who had gone to pet the pig just prior to the impromptu a-la-main meal, immediately alerted the pig's owner, farmer Paul Caygill, and hopes to be reunited with the ring given to her 30 years ago once nature takes its course (Fox News).

And while Anne Moon is left hanging around dumb animals, in the Norwegian town of Helgoysund, it is the dumb animals that are hanging around. For it is there that a ram managed to get its horns entangled in one of the town's overhead electric cables, before losing its footing, astonishing onlookers as it subsequently abseiled down the hill towards the next pole. Locals suspect that this may have been caused by an over rambitious attempt to reach the ewes in a lower field, and after the ram was eventually towed back to higher ground and released unharmed, he was allowed access by way of compensation for his ordeal (Daily Mail).

Still on the subject of dumb animals, that is presumably what one Parisian store is hoping to attract with its latest creation, a fusball table populated entirely by Barbies. The "Barbie Foot", by French "concept-store" Colette, uses 22 of the ubiquitous dolls, in contrasting uniforms of pink and white in its limited edition table football game, which it hopes to sell for 10,000 euros, that is $14,000, each (Guardian).



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Posted By: Dumbfounded - Wed Aug 12, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category: Animals, Crime, Death, Exercise and Fitness, Furniture, Government, Law, Television, Goofs and Screw-ups

Irony

While a 53-year-old man was competing successfully in the swimming section of the National Senior Games in Palo Alto, California, his 61-year-old brother was back home in Madison, Indiana, at the Yacht Club. When the brother called home to his mother to tell her he had just won a 500-yard freestyle, she told him his older brother had just been swept away in the rain-swollen Ohio River and could not be located. The Madison Courier. His body was later found.

Posted By: qualityleashdog - Mon Aug 10, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category: Accidents, Boats, Contests, Races and Other Competitions, Death, Exercise and Fitness, Oceans and Maritime Pursuits, Synchronicity and Coincidence

So Weird It Hurts?

Not @%#&?! likely! But this post is on a subject close to my heart, pain (must see a doctor about that).

Cartoon expletives aside, a bit of invective can do you the world of good, or so said scientists recently. A research team from from Keele University asked volunteers to hold their hand in freezing water for as long as they could manage while repeating either an innocuous word or the swear-word of their choice. The swearers held out for an average of two minutes, while non-swearers managed only 1 minute 15 seconds. But while Rohan Byrt of the Casual Swearing Appreciation Society claimed the study demonstrated the benefits of swearing, team leader Richard Stephens warned that everyday swearing would lessen its painkilling effects. "Swearing is emotional language" he explained, "but if you overuse it, it loses its emotional attachment" (BBC News).

From this week, pregnant women throughout Britain considering "letting it out" to help with the pain might also want to direct their curses towards Dr Denis Walsh, associate professor of midwifery at Nottingham University in England. In an article in the journal Evidence Based Midwifery, Dr Walsh claimed last week that the pain of childbirth was useful and a "timeless rite of passage", and women should not be trying to avoid it with epidural anaesthesia. Walsh based his statement on the fact that the use of epidurals has almost doubled in the past two decades, claiming that in 20% of cases, the procedure was unnecessary. While some, like Dr. Justin Clarke of the Birmingham Women's Hospital, rejected Walsh's data, saying it was wrong to characterise modern women as "less stoical", others supported him, such as Mary Newburn of the National Childbirth Trust who spoke of there being an "epidural culture" (Telegraph).

But perhaps women might be convinced to trade in the needle for a fancy rubber suit? Baltimore company Under Armour has developed a hi-tech, full length bodysuit that is said to allow athletes recover more quickly after strenuous activity. Under Armour's "Recharge" range gently squeezes the athlete's body forcing excess fluid out of the muscles and back into the bloodstream over a period of hours after a workout, reversing the "pumped" effect of the exercise. Research by the University of Connecticut showed that doing so resulted in subjects feeling less soreness and swelling of the muscles and recuperating faster (Journal Gazette).



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Posted By: Dumbfounded - Tue Jul 14, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category: Exercise and Fitness, Frauds, Cons and Scams, Health, Injuries, Medicine, Obscenity, Science, Experiments, Stupid Criminals, Weddings

Naim Süleymanoğlu: The Pocket Hercules

This weightlifter from Turkey stands only 4 feet 10 inches tall, but can lift more than 3 times his bodyweight over his head.

Posted By: fyshstyxx - Sat Jul 04, 2009 - Comments (1)
Category: Exercise and Fitness, Human Marvels

Seminary Girls

Did you know that Thomas Edison pioneered the "Girls Gone Wild" theme?

Posted By: Paul - Wed Jul 01, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category: Education, Exercise and Fitness, Nineteenth Century

Thomas Inch and the Inch Dumbbell

Thomas Inch (1881-1963) was a famous weightlifter from England. He is most famous for having a 172 pound dumbbell that nobody else could lift off the floor with one hand. He would offer large sums of money to anyone that could lift it. It is possible, however, that his act was a scam, as he had 4 dumbells that looked the same but were different weights (bait and switch?) and he never challenged a handful of lifters that were considered stronger than him. He was also very careful in how he phrased his own lifting of the weight as he never really mentioned putting it overhead with just one hand.


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Posted By: fyshstyxx - Thu Jun 25, 2009 - Comments (0)
Category: Exercise and Fitness, Frauds, Cons and Scams, Human Marvels